Thursday, November 30, 2006

Orkut

Orkut is a wonderful place to find friends with common interests. Orkut also helps one find dates. It is an awesome site to keep in touch with your long lost classmates and friends who sailed across the ocean to pursue that degree they'd always been raving about.

Just like most other people in my age group who have access to computers and a decent Internet connection, I have an Orkut account. If I remember correctly, I have had it for about two years now. What started out to be this elite, by-invitation-only access where you'd find fellow geeks and nerds, proliferated into a site where even my little sister has an account and hence knows all my friends, what they scrapped today and the testimonials they wrote.

Of course, that is a good problem to have.
But with Orkut going free for all the lame cheapoos who have come into orkut are actually destroying the main purpose of the site.....

There's a lot in a name - A lot of Orkut names sound like a riddle to me. So much that when one of them tries sending me a friend request or a scrap, I need to pull out a pencil to decipher the name. It is always some GoDfAtheR or ♥♥♥ अिनष ♥♥♥ a²+b²-m²+c²-h²+k² or DeviL$$EyE### or (-)@R$(-)@ thats my name ...!!!! or some name like "Jo Hua So Hua... Lelo Saaman Aur Chalo Goa..." or "DON" or "۞๑DINESHPAPPAN๑۞ ♥ ♥" or "**n0b0Dy'$ hErE ~~ M aL0nE !!!!!~~" or "Something i need tht u can provide..Ur absence" or "ForZa grAziA miLaNo.........." or "Nemesis MILANO ... Rinascita grande MILANO"
Gasp! Grow up, folks!

The picture - The profile picture is supposed to depict you. Or what you're trying to convey. Or your interests. What am I supposed to understand if I see a picture of a shirtless Salman Khan? Or Sharukh Khan wearing expensive glasses? Or Aishwarya Rai? Or a fat, drooling baby?

I mean how am I gonna recognize you if you put up a picture of your dog or your fav actor.....

Scraps, Fans, Testimonials Race - There's no chance in hell of you being unknown to a person who'll keep asking you to scrap him atleast 10 times a day just to increase his no. of scraps OR will keep asking you to write a nice testimonial OR asking you to become his fan..... whats the point dude..... again its completely senseless..... There aint no award by GOOGLE for the person with most no. of scraps or most no. of fans or most no. of Testimonials.....

Irritating Scraps - Dun have any replies to scraps like these :

dosti hoti nahi bhool jane ke liye,
dost hote nahi bichhad jane ke liye,
dosti karke khush rahoge itna ki,
waqt nahi milega aansu bahane ke liye.
HI..(\\\\_ _/)       (\\_ _//)
       (=“•“=)        (=“•“=)
       (“) ♥ (“)        (“) ♥ (“)
      ▒▒▒▒▒▒     ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒
   ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒  ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒
  ▒▒▒ Make a friend, is a gift ▒▒▒
 ▒▒▒▒ Have a friend, is a Grace ▒▒▒
▒ Maintain a friend, is a virtue ▒
 ▒▒▒ But, have you as like friend ▒▒▒▒
   ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ is a ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒
     ▒▒▒▒ great happiness ▒▒▒
       ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒
          ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒

: ****__********__***
........ (''''(`-``'´´-´)'''')
..........).....--.......--....(
........./.....(6..._...6)....\
.........\........(..0..)....;../
......__.`.-._..'='..._.-.`.__
..../......'###.,.--.,.###.'...\
....\__))####'#'###(((__/
......##### u r #####
........### SWEET. ###
....../....#########...\
..__\.....\..######/...../
(.(.(____)....`.#.´..(____).).)

and


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JO SCRAP nahin karte, unki scrap book main keede pad jate hai....so do scrap to me...

FUCK..... this last one was a killer..... keede pad jaate hai..... damn GOOGLE needs to work on some kinda insecticide for such things!

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

LMao, so true. I pretty much delete all my Orkut mails/ whatever they are called. So many freaking forwards.

I still don't get whats up with the no. of scraps? just coz you've got a bazillion scraps doesnt mean you have a big dick!! GET OVER IT

sHaDy said...

u sob, mf,fuck u put my name wit one of those idiots u lazy bastard...ok i will get back at this....but yeah there r even more lammer stuff on orkut dude... thos add request just keep getting better....and funnier...if its pick up lines that u need then this is the place...lol yeah its a freaks world out there and these guys r the best at it...

save those worthless souls...

and u good for nothing bastard u r one of them..dhaw

Unknown said...

wuzz you lkie to da fndshap wid me ???

Unknown said...

LMAO.....fuck!!... so true...
oye dhaw... u got so jobless to rite documentary on worthless orkuters?? ... lmao... n yea i think u shud send a copy of this to those BRILLIANT groups like ... " I LUV ORKUT" lmao or sumthing like " I M ONLINE ALL DAY" communities..! they'll surely kick ass (ur ass) ... lmao...
n yea u forgot the "FAKE PROFILES"
like.. MALMSTEEN OR SHARUKHAN??n fan clubs of anonymous ppl??..lol

Ananya said...

Hahahahahahahaha !! so true !! while readin this i felt somebody just read my mind !! hahahahahaha !! well written !!

Unknown said...

damn !!! dats so fuckin true :P

Anonymous said...

yeah right so the blogger above my buddy abhi enjoys this and she is the one for whom this blog is made

Anonymous said...

no pun intented
lolz

EccEntrIcIty pErsOnIfIEd said...

ROFL... chk out when this was posted!!! pun intended!!! :P

Anonymous said...

dhawal u have made the lord angry u r entitled to brutal punishment

lolzzzzzzzzz

Ananya said...

And somebody made the God of wannabes happy .. so the person is entitled to Capital Punishment.. ;-)

Anonymous said...

lmao...
dis is so true...